Jealousy
by heroherondaletotheresuce
Summary: One Shot - Jem/OC. Just a random drabble. R&R Disclaimer: Cassandra Clare owns all characters. I just own my OC & plot. - Rated T just in-case, though nothing major at all.


Rain droplets cascaded down the carriage windows as the cart bumped its way along the hard London roads. Staring out the window, Rosemarie ran her eyes along the trees and plants as they passed by and she noticed a shadow of another carriage, close behind, trailing along with them.

Sighing rise closed her eyes, she knew it was Jem. She wished it wasn't. She had tried to leave the grand ball without him noticing, or anyone really but charlotte for that matter. She wanted to be alone. She didn't want anyone to follower her home, because that would result in them asking her why she left. This was a topic she'd rather not bring up.

The lightwood's held their annual ball at one of their many mansions in the far countryside of London. Everyone was dressed up in gowns and suits of all colours and designs, all seeming to be having a good time. It was the first ball she had ever been to in London, and she was enjoying it… that was until she saw Jem across the dance floor holding his friend Mei in his delicate arms.

Mei had recently sailed in from shanghai, one of Jem's childhood friends. At first, Mei was friendly and easy to get along with, that was until she realised that Rose too had a liking for Jem. Ever since she found this out she had been stuck to him like glue and not too subtle about it either. She would always put their friendship on parade; flaunting it in front of rose, just to be sure she knew her place.

Rose was clouded with jealousy when she saw the two moving gracefully across the floor, the two spirits complimenting each other perfectly. This lead to her thinking of not being good enough, not just for Jem, but for anyone. What person would care about her in that way? She was a hopeless case, the very reason her parents left her. All of these destructive thoughts made her sick to the stomach.

She found Charlotte fairly quickly; mainly because she spotted Henry's head; his red hair a beacon in the crowd of gracefully tall shadowhunters. She informed Charlotte that she was feeling ill and wished to go back to the institute immediately in fear that her condition would worsen and soon Charlotte send word for Cyril to come and take her home where she could rest.

Arriving at the front of the institute, Rose opened the door to the carriage, muttering a thanks to Cyril before picking up her skirts and running inside, trying her best not to get soaked by the raindrops pelting down. She made her way to the stairs as fast as she could when she heard footsteps behind her. Rushing further through the corridors she finally reached her room, closing the door and locking it for good measure. She slid down the back of the door, wiping the tears from her face, or the rain water. She wasn't so sure anymore.

There was a frantic knock on the door moments later. She knew he would come in eventually. But she didn't know what she would say to him. She was never really good with lying, especially with him. She was scared. What would he think? Would he laugh at her ridiculous fantasy of having his affections or would he pity her poor soul because he could not return the desperate feelings? Again, it was all hopeless.

"Rose, are you alright?" Jem said through the door, before knocking again.

There was silence for a moment, she didn't trust her voice. She coughed once and gulped. Ready to perform her lie, praying that it was convincing.

"Fine James; just feeling a little under the weather; I think I may have caught a cold." She said all quite clearly, neutral, with no crack in her voice and if she didn't know better she may just believe it herself.

"Are you sure? Open up, we can talk." He said turning the handle, before frowning only to realise that it was locked. The sincerity in his voice made her want to cry; it was also another reminder that he was just her friend, nothing more, not like with Mei. She sniffled and held back a sob.

"Jem, just go. I'm fine." But this time the pain seeped through, clearly evident in her few words.

"Rose." He said in a soft voice, leaning down on the other side of the door.

"Please, open up. I want to help." He pleaded. He knew something was up. She was so excited about the ball this morning, why would she leave all of a sudden? Especially when she was looking beautiful in that midnight blue dress. He was stunned to see her walk out of the room.

Dear god she thought. Why was she being so selfish? She shouldn't be here sulking in a corner just because she is jealous. She shouldn't be making others worry all because she didn't get the man she wanted. She stood up and straightened out her dress, and using the back of her hand wiping her cheeks that were stained wet from her many tears. She prayed that they weren't bloodshot.

She slowly unlocked the door, opening it to see Jem standing there, looking at her with such compassion and sympathy. She stepped aside, letting him come inside the room. She didn't bother closing the door, after all it was just the two of them in the institute tonight, the other's wouldn't be back for hours, after all the ball had barely gotten past dinner. They both sat down on the bed, her focusing on some stray fabric on her dress that was not wet, and him just staring at her.

Jem wondered what was wrong, she was so beautiful and to see her hurt like this made his heart ache. Leaning forward he moved a stray curl out of her face.

"Rose do you want to tell me what happened? I want to help." He pleaded.

"No. Nothing. It's fine, you'll only pity me and that'll hurt more." She replied harshly. She didn't mean it that way, it just came out.

He took a deep breath and moved back a little bit. "I'm sorry if it comes across that way, I genuinely don't pity you rose. Never." He said softer this time.

"Jem, I-I just. I don't know how to say this. What do you want me to say? The truth? Well here it is. I love you James Carstairs." She said breathlessly, before continuing her rant as he watched her with wide eyes.

"I love you and seeing you dance with Mei and going out for walks with Mei and everything with Mei just makes me die a little bit inside every time. I couldn't stand to see you two together at the ball. I-I just couldn't do it. That's why I came back here, to wallow in my own self-pity." She confessed, closing her eyes, some stray tears falling upon her rosy cheeks.

Jem looked at her in astonishment for a moment, until it clicked in his head. She likes you. No. She loves you. Rosemarie loves you. A small grin made its way upon his lips, and he reached over, placing one hand on her cheek, grabbing her attention. She looked up at him expectantly waiting for an answer, one that she's been afraid of receiving.

"You love me." He said, smiling softly, his hot breath touching her face as he spoke.

"Yes." She said her blue eyes trailing over his own.

He replied by tilting her head in line with his own, his lips meeting hers and an unspoken I love you too floating in the air.


End file.
